Monday, December 05, 2005
The Valuable Lesson of Homelessness
By Marcelina Blea, staff writer
After spending three weeks living out of my suitcase, car, going from couch to couch and having no "home," I am looking back at what I learned.
It was as if, I was on a road trip for three weeks. Don't get me wrong, I love road trips. I wish I could drive across the country.
Yet, this one was hard because the whole thing was unintentional. Even, if it's a spontaneous road trip, at least my purpose is to have fun, to relax or explore. And usually I don't have major responsibilities on road trips.
In late August 2005 and early September I found myself homeless. Of course I didn’t plan this. I moved to San Francisco in Jan. 2004, to live on-campus for one year. After leaving the Village aka SF State summer camp, I moved off-campus. It was okay. My new roomies were quite dull and boring. I longed to live again with my last roommate, Leana.
Her and I began hunting for apartments in June. Then Leana left for New York, followed by another trip to Jordan, leaving me to search on my own. A few perspective roommates and abandon searches later, I was out of time and out of a home.
One of those dull and boring roommates, turned out to be a jerk. The other roomie and I both ended up moving out. I told the jerky roommate I didn’t have another place, but he told me I needed to move because someone else was moving in. I know it was another girl and I suspect he was trying to hit it, as he cleaned the apartment for the first time in eight months.
Leana did return to San Francisco and met up with me. We began searching for apartments together. She was staying with friends of ours, on their couch and would shower in SF State’s locker room. I was worried her and I were going to be fighting for the same couch soon.
The hardest part about not having a permanent home, is people refused to believe me. I know I wasn't sleeping in Golden Gate Park, but there are different kinds of homelessness. There's a big difference between a homeless crack head and a homeless family. I did have most of my necessities in my car, including a Rubbermaid full of clothes, backpack, laptop and a Club for protection. I stood with three different people, in a matter of three weeks. At one place, I only brought in my backpack, and had to come and go, on my friend’s schedule.
Countless classmates refused to believe me, asking “Are there even homeless students?” Yes, there are.
I wasn’t alone. After one long Saturday afternoon of apartment hunting, Leana and I sat in a taqueria in the Inner Sunset. I wanted to cry, at the confusion of being without a home. I finally lifted my head from my taco and asked “How did we end up here?”
At first I was reluctant to tell people I had no home. Then I got weathered and beaten, real fast. Every night, I wasn’t sure where I was going to sleep. I spent my days and nights at school, mostly in the Journalism lab. Unsuspecting classmates may have thought I was working on my articles. Little did they know I was just hanging out or searching Craig’s List. I even missed this semester’s first deadline.
One night vividly stands out in my mind. It was almost 11 p.m. I sat in the chained up chairs, near Café Rosso, waiting for a friend who is a teacher aide to finish her work. The friend I was staying with called and said they were going out of town for four days. I had just finished a long day and night at school. All I wanted to do was sleep. Maybe then I could forget about everything. Attempting to maintain my tough kid image, I tried to hold back my tears, as I called a friend’s mother and asked her if I could borrow her couch. She let me stay at her home, until I found a place. That was the best sleep I had all year long.
I came to San Francisco to attend college, not to couch surf. Attempting to maintain my grades, proved to be a challenge. Going to class was the easy part, at least I could sleep in class.
It became annoying real fast, when countless people told be “just search Craig’s List.” Although, I have found my last apartment, my internship and weekend job on Craig’s List, I was getting no love from CL this time around. There are several problems with the housing listings. Sure, there are countless each day. However, people are very specific about what type of person they want as a roommate. They don’t always put this in their posting. Occasionally, the apartment or room to rent is not as describe, with people having unhealthy living conditions or trying to rent you their living rooms.
Some people don’t show up when you schedule a viewing. Or multiple people show up to check out the same room. This is how I met Jahmie. Her, Leana and I and several other people all showed up at a house in the Panhandle, looking to rent the same room. Jahmie was also homeless, after arriving from MI to study art. I also have another friend who ended up homeless, after his parents moved out of town.
The experience has been an eye opener. Now, I'm all staying inside my new apartment a lot. Whereas, during those three weeks I went out and did a lot of things. Not everything I did cost a lot of money. Sometimes I went out because I had nowhere else to go. At other times, I felt like tomorrow was not going to matter. Yet, a tiny piece of me would hope tomorrow would come because it's not today.
I hope I never forget how it felt to be out (usually at school or waiting somewhere) all day and all night. When I see homeless kids I just want to scream. Why don't you at least try to go home or seek help? Where are your parents, friends or loved ones? I hope they have someone that loves them. I don't get it. At times, it really sucked.
As much as it sucked, I would do it again. This was the only way I was going to learn something valuable.
Now, the only road trip I'm able to go on is a cruise on the Broke Boat. Wait, if there's no road is it called a "sea trip?"
After spending three weeks living out of my suitcase, car, going from couch to couch and having no "home," I am looking back at what I learned.
It was as if, I was on a road trip for three weeks. Don't get me wrong, I love road trips. I wish I could drive across the country.
Yet, this one was hard because the whole thing was unintentional. Even, if it's a spontaneous road trip, at least my purpose is to have fun, to relax or explore. And usually I don't have major responsibilities on road trips.
In late August 2005 and early September I found myself homeless. Of course I didn’t plan this. I moved to San Francisco in Jan. 2004, to live on-campus for one year. After leaving the Village aka SF State summer camp, I moved off-campus. It was okay. My new roomies were quite dull and boring. I longed to live again with my last roommate, Leana.
Her and I began hunting for apartments in June. Then Leana left for New York, followed by another trip to Jordan, leaving me to search on my own. A few perspective roommates and abandon searches later, I was out of time and out of a home.
One of those dull and boring roommates, turned out to be a jerk. The other roomie and I both ended up moving out. I told the jerky roommate I didn’t have another place, but he told me I needed to move because someone else was moving in. I know it was another girl and I suspect he was trying to hit it, as he cleaned the apartment for the first time in eight months.
Leana did return to San Francisco and met up with me. We began searching for apartments together. She was staying with friends of ours, on their couch and would shower in SF State’s locker room. I was worried her and I were going to be fighting for the same couch soon.
The hardest part about not having a permanent home, is people refused to believe me. I know I wasn't sleeping in Golden Gate Park, but there are different kinds of homelessness. There's a big difference between a homeless crack head and a homeless family. I did have most of my necessities in my car, including a Rubbermaid full of clothes, backpack, laptop and a Club for protection. I stood with three different people, in a matter of three weeks. At one place, I only brought in my backpack, and had to come and go, on my friend’s schedule.
Countless classmates refused to believe me, asking “Are there even homeless students?” Yes, there are.
I wasn’t alone. After one long Saturday afternoon of apartment hunting, Leana and I sat in a taqueria in the Inner Sunset. I wanted to cry, at the confusion of being without a home. I finally lifted my head from my taco and asked “How did we end up here?”
At first I was reluctant to tell people I had no home. Then I got weathered and beaten, real fast. Every night, I wasn’t sure where I was going to sleep. I spent my days and nights at school, mostly in the Journalism lab. Unsuspecting classmates may have thought I was working on my articles. Little did they know I was just hanging out or searching Craig’s List. I even missed this semester’s first deadline.
One night vividly stands out in my mind. It was almost 11 p.m. I sat in the chained up chairs, near Café Rosso, waiting for a friend who is a teacher aide to finish her work. The friend I was staying with called and said they were going out of town for four days. I had just finished a long day and night at school. All I wanted to do was sleep. Maybe then I could forget about everything. Attempting to maintain my tough kid image, I tried to hold back my tears, as I called a friend’s mother and asked her if I could borrow her couch. She let me stay at her home, until I found a place. That was the best sleep I had all year long.
I came to San Francisco to attend college, not to couch surf. Attempting to maintain my grades, proved to be a challenge. Going to class was the easy part, at least I could sleep in class.
It became annoying real fast, when countless people told be “just search Craig’s List.” Although, I have found my last apartment, my internship and weekend job on Craig’s List, I was getting no love from CL this time around. There are several problems with the housing listings. Sure, there are countless each day. However, people are very specific about what type of person they want as a roommate. They don’t always put this in their posting. Occasionally, the apartment or room to rent is not as describe, with people having unhealthy living conditions or trying to rent you their living rooms.
Some people don’t show up when you schedule a viewing. Or multiple people show up to check out the same room. This is how I met Jahmie. Her, Leana and I and several other people all showed up at a house in the Panhandle, looking to rent the same room. Jahmie was also homeless, after arriving from MI to study art. I also have another friend who ended up homeless, after his parents moved out of town.
The experience has been an eye opener. Now, I'm all staying inside my new apartment a lot. Whereas, during those three weeks I went out and did a lot of things. Not everything I did cost a lot of money. Sometimes I went out because I had nowhere else to go. At other times, I felt like tomorrow was not going to matter. Yet, a tiny piece of me would hope tomorrow would come because it's not today.
I hope I never forget how it felt to be out (usually at school or waiting somewhere) all day and all night. When I see homeless kids I just want to scream. Why don't you at least try to go home or seek help? Where are your parents, friends or loved ones? I hope they have someone that loves them. I don't get it. At times, it really sucked.
As much as it sucked, I would do it again. This was the only way I was going to learn something valuable.
Now, the only road trip I'm able to go on is a cruise on the Broke Boat. Wait, if there's no road is it called a "sea trip?"
