[X]PRESSONLINE

by Dan Verel, [X]press Online

The culinary gods have returned to the Cesar Chavez Student Union recently, where the lack of a specific product had at least one East Coast ex-pat wondering if the happy days would ever be rekindled. Cheez Whiz, in all its yellow, gooey glory, has returned to the once-mighty cheesesteak -- and it is good.

Update: Nearly three weeks ago, the fine folks at the Gold Coast Grill let a disaster go ignored when the Cheez Whiz warmer broke and was never replaced -- until now, that is. The problem was finally addressed shortly after the Thanksgiving break ended.

During that stretch, one student said he was forced to try all sorts of alternatives to replicate the authentic Philly cheesesteak, which, despite protests from the fooderalis in the Bay Area, contains… you guessed it… Cheez Whiz.

“I tried nacho cheese, four slices of cheddar, extra mayonnaise, but nothing ever came close,” I said to myself. It was a long three weeks, to be sure. So long, in fact, that I began to have conversations in my head and even remembered some of the quotes, like the one you just read.

But it was during those three weeks that my love for the Cheez Whiz cheesesteak was cemented. To be honest, I needed the break, and actually grew accustomed to ordering other delicious-but-not-very-healthy lunches, like turkey melts, pastrami sandwiches and Polish sausages.

Then, the Whiz came back -- I hadn’t even known. One day, when I ordered a pastrami sandwich, one line cook gave me a simple nod. I nodded back, and before I knew it, he was smearing the yellowy goo on what was supposed to be pastrami and Swiss! Well, too late now, I said, this is the price I must pay. The pastrami and Whiz combo wasn’t all that bad, either; a bit salty, but not terrible.

I returned the next day, eager to sink my teeth into the gooey beef, mayo and Whiz concoction, and it did not disappoint. Although the gentleman behind the grill put way too much mayo on the Philly classic, the Whiz reminded me why the cheesesteak is perhaps the most venerable sandwich in all of America. The Clogger comes close, as does the Monte Cristo, but nothing is quite as powerfully simple as lean beef, Cheez Whiz, grilled onions and mushrooms on a nice toasted bun.

I have learned to enjoy this gelatinous snack in moderation lately, though. Whenever I order something other than a cheesesteak, the kind sirs behind the grill first look shocked when I say, “No, really, I just want a tuna melt.” Then they nod, perhaps grateful that I’ve become less of a pain in the ass, and just a tiny bit healthier.

For more information on the Clogger, visit: http://www.roadfood.com/Reviews/Overview.aspx?RefID=4282

For more information on the Monte Cristo, visit: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monte_Cristo_sandwich